Review website Franco and I are part of

Our Reviews is a website started by Dinar Khayrutdinov which is based in the Only Solitaire facebook group. Franco and I are involved and basically it involves a group of people volunteering to review albums, where the person hosting the round puts them with another person. When this has been completed we assign the person we were giving an album to review, and the person who was assigned us an album does likewise.

It's a lot of fun and probably not as convoluted as I made it sound!

It's done an a Google Doc and the reviews are posted to the blogger I linked, so you can ago there and read a bunch of reviews by different people.

Us and Them: Symphonic Pink Floyd- Jaz Coleman

1) Time 2) Brain Damage 3) Another Brick in the Wall Part 2 4) Comfortably Numb 5) Breathe 6) Money 7) The Great Gig in the Sky 8) Nobody Home 9) Us and Them 10) Time (The Old Tree with Winding Roots Behind the Lake of Dreams Mix) 

I've known about this album for some time but I must admit the main reason I'm reviewing it is as a corollary to Franco's Yes review. As can be glimmered through Franco's review the main problem with the Yes Symphonic album is that the title was slightly inaccurate, what with the songs having symphonic accompaniment rather than being fully done with orchestral instrumentation. 

Well this one is a total lie, there's no instruments at all! 

Okay that's not true, this one is fully orchestral and I believe is intended to get Pink Floyd fans into classical music, or something. It's also really good! The orchestral instrumentation really gives the music this grandiose, epic feel to it. That's probably due to conductor Peter Scholes getting The London Philharmonic Orchestra to perform on it. And who arranged it but Jaz Coleman, Killing Joke's Jaz Coleman! Based on what I've read he's received some accolades for his Classical work and he does a particularly good job here, taking the Floyd songs and carving them into something distinctively his. 

This can have drawbacks though, in that the paranoid and pissy mood of Pink Floyd is somewhat lost. Pink Floyd are a divisive band though so it's possible that with this aspect of Pink Floyd removed and their melodies played in this manner this could be an ideal way to enjoy the disputed genius of Roger Waters. Oh, and there's no lyrics as well. To continue further with this theme one thing that I see Pink Floyd accused of sometimes and that I can sympathise with a bit is that they weren't particularly good melody writers. I'm not going to hold up this album as indisputable proof as to the inaccuracy of this because I don't entirely agree with it and of but this really does make the melodies stand out for me personally. Maybe I'm being swayed by the sweeping arrangements but this album really does feel like something some posh guy could whistle and impress his posh family with. By that I mean it's tuneful. 

Another drawback is that the album only features songs from Dark Side of the Moon and The Wall. For the most part the song choice is good and it does make sense to choose from their most famous songs but man an Echoes cover would have elevated this (assuming it didn't suck). 

So, how about the song choice? Well it starts off with a great version of Time. The opening in particular is great, with sweeping violin and cool sound effects, than a bit that sounds almost industrial! It settles pretty quickly into a Classical piece. It ends up sounding really sort of majestic, but in an almost snooty authoritative way, but it's varied and can sound pretty dreamy at some points as well, with some tender bits. Brain Damage is interesting as well, having a more whimsical tone than the Pink Floyd original, being quite sprightly and melodic. It could easily be used in a ballet, probably, I don't know, I haven't actually seen any ballet. Money is similarly interesting, sounding like it could have been used in the soundtrack for Brazil (the film, not the country). I should probably elaborate for those who haven't seen Brazil, and because just pointing out instances when songs could be used in a soundtrack is a pretty lazy way to do a review. Well, basically it's mischievous but also weighty, kind of sarcastic almost. Then they screw it up by making it tender and weepy towards the end. 

Not everything will make you wish your mother was a piano though, as surprisingly the version of Us and Them is kinda crappy. Well, relative to the rest of the album, I gave it a 7/10 in my notes. And those fucks at Allmusic liked it! In an otherwise negative review! Well that they liked it should be sign enough of its lack of quality. 

Oh okay I'll review it. 

Well although it is pretty it loses a lot of the uniquely blissed out atmosphere of the original, it feels less individualistic. This would already be enough to make me hold it in lesser regard but parts of it also sound really meandering and uncertain, like the conductor was giving this "oh shit I forgot how to conduct" face and the Orchestra had to compensate. It's definitely nice enough to listen to but it's the closest the album comes to sounding like bland classical muzak. 

There's also an unnecessary remix of Time at the end. 

Okay another paragraph of songs I like. Personally I like Clare Torry's singing but for those who don't the version of The Great Gig in the Sky here is a godsend. She's replaced by a violin! Has a kind of playfully romantic feel, which is new for Pink Floyd. Breathe has organ playing and a staccato trumpet and it's amusing that something previously so mellow and stones is now a brash and celebratory upbeat composition. Comfortably Numb translates about as well as you'd think it would, which is exquisitely, being moody and with a slightly sinister undercurrent, then it gets really epic when the classical equivalent of the chorus starts playing. It sounds like something that could play when someone accomplishes their life goal, like me writing this not at all repetitive and way overdue review! 

Hey, remember how Another Brick in the Wall, Part 2 l was kind of a funky discoey song, well now it sounds like something that could be played by sad poets with their heads hanging down gloomily in gloom. Very brooding with a tender core, with some guitars it could almost be a Killing Joke song! 

So, I probably liked this album a lot more than I should. There's something intrinsically cheesy and tacky about converting rock songs to classical music, it feels almost dishonest and ultimately pointless, like remaking sitcoms without the jokes. However I think the highest accolade I can give this album and none which makes those potential criticisms null is that if I had heard this before hearing Pink Floyd, or if these had been original compositions even, I'd still like it a lot. It's tastefully done, conveys a good range of emotions and has memorable hooks

Stoned: A Psych Tribute To The Rolling Stones

1) What a Shame - Lorelle Meets The Obsolete 2) Sympathy For The Devil - The KVB 3) Under My Thumb - Shiny Darkly 4) Sway - Yeti Lane 5) It's Only Rock & Roll (But I Like It) - Clinic 6) Gimmie Shelter - Sons of Hippies 7) She Smiled Sweetly - The Vacant Lots 8) Child of the Moon - Celestial Bums 9) Take It or Leave It - Tashaki Mijaki 10) Stoned - Allah-Lahs 11) Satisfaction - Pink Velvet 12) Beast Of Burden - Pure X 13) As Tears Go By - Cheval Sombre 14) Wild Horses - The Tulips


Mmmm, The Rolling Stones. Not a while ago, there was a point in my life where I thought this group was the most overrated rock band in existence. As of recently, I have started to get into them, and I've realized that The Rolling Stones were more than just a generic hard rock band. They tackled many different styles, were willing to experiment and expand their sound, and overall were extremely versatile in more genres than you would believe. Nevertheless, when they played rock music, they played it with soul and grit, and no one rocked out better then they did.

So, here's this tribute album, which features a large amount of indie artists giving psychedelic treatments to songs by the Stones, resulting in an overall sound that is similar to the music of Tame Impala and Warpaint. Does this all work out? Let's fine out!


What A Shame - Lorelle Meets The Obsoleteor

Ah, I have not heard this song, so I don't know how it compares to the original, but I do enjoy this cover. It plays like a standard upbeat R&B tune, except layered with phased guitars and special effects. You would think this would result in a mess, but it all comes out pretty coherent, listenable, and tight. Nice job! 8/10

Sympathy For The Devil - The KVB

This classic is given a different spin, as the Latin-esque feel of the original is replaced with a style that reminisces Jesus and The Mary Chain. The vocals are shoved way back in the mix, with airy feedback laced guitars being placed in the front, which makes it sound as though the group is playing this in a large empty cathedral. It's not a serious improvement over the original, but it's fairly good. 7/10

Under My Thumb - Shiny Darkly

This is basically done in the same way as the last track, but I like this better, because while I enjoyed the other track, this one seems to sound better in thi style, and the group stays true enough to the original for the piece to sound incredibly catchy. A light 8/10

Sway - Yeti Lane

At first I didn't like this Stone's track very much, but now the piece has grown on me quite a bit, and so has this cover. Basically, the production is again almost identical to the last two tracks, except there seems to be a lot more emphasis on synthesizers in this case. Not sure what else to add, but I'll give it a high 6/10.

It's Only Rock And Roll - Clinic

I'm quite a big fan of Clinic, so I had set my expectations far too high before I heard this track. On my initial listen of this album, I hated this so much that I was actually going to give it a 0/10. However, I realized that, really, no one is taking this tribute album THAT seriously (other than me), so why should Clinic? They are clearly just having good clean fun. Basically, everything about the original song is changed. EVERYTHING. Gone are any traces of "rock n' roll" in the song, as the instrumentation is replaced with a drum machine, some synthesizers, and...yeah that's it. The lead vocalist, drenched in reverb, doesn't actually sing any the verses, just the chorus, which he doesn't so much sing but rather whimpers through it. Then, in the bridge of the song, he suddenly just says, for no reason in particular, "I'm a 45 year old man trapped inside the body of a 45 year old man, and I like it". In the end, Clinic's cover ends up sounding more like bizarre circus tune than anything actually reminiscing rock and roll, and while it's not good at all, it's so intentionally bad that I can't help but find this absolutely hilarious. So even though I'm giving this a 3/10, please do yourself a favor and listen to this at least once, because it should probably give you a good laugh. 

Gimmie Shelter - Sons Of Hippies

Hey this is a solid cover! Unlike much of the other tunes on here, this cover is very straightforward and polished, the trippiness of the sound being more subdued and less obvious than before. No way in hell does it even compete to the original, but overall, I would say this is a good cover! 7/10

She Smiled Sweetly - The Vacant Lots

I don't think I've heard the original of this song, but can't say I like this too much. The lead vocalist just sounds robotic and unemotional, reminding me more of the lead singer of Kraftwerk than Mick Jagger, and as far as it's musical texture goes, it's just more of the same, with there being a drum machine and some guitars and some synths and a lot of reverb. I like the beat of the song, and it still sounds catchy despite all this, but overall this doesn't impress me very much. 4/10

Child Of The Moon - Celestial Bums

Here we go, a song from the Stones psychedelic era! This is a great cover! Much like everything else here, there are layers of guitars, the lead singers voice is pushed back, and everything is soaked in reverb. However, they took what was once a three minute pop song and expanded it into a five and a half minute shoegaze epic. This is very well arranged, having a very gothic sound sound to it. A strong 9/10

Take It Or Leave It - Tashaski Miyaki

I like this cover because I really like the melody to this song, although not sure how to describe tit without repeating myself. It's soaked with reverb, there's lotsa guitars mixed in, and there some effects here and there...but the song has a great melody, the retro-psychedelic vibe seems to fit in very well. Not spectacular but adequate none the less. 6/10

Stoned - Allah-Lahs

This is different, but it still seems to fit in pretty well nonetheless. It has a more early 60s surf rock vibe going than a psychedelic vibe, but it's pretty fun, though not anything special. 5/10

Satisfaction - Pink Velvet

I'm going to go honest here, I try my hardest in my reviews to specifically explain why I like or dislike something, but this is a case where I am honestly stumped. Maybe, I think my issue with this piece is that sounds too sluggish, and, redone as a Motown-soul number, nothing seems to gel well together. Hmmm...I don't quite know, but I'm going to give it a 5/10 either way, because there's nothing truly bad about it.

Beast Of Burden - Pure X

This one is strange, but I like it. It contains a drum machine, layers of synths sounds, a whispering sound, and a falsetto voice singing the lead that I can't tell whether is or male or female. Overall, I find myself engaged by soundscape this piece builds, and while a lot of does seem pointless, they were probably just having fun and not trying to make a serious statement. So while not great, it's pretty fun. Probably not worth more than one or two listens though. a strong 5/10

As Tears Go By - Cheval Sombre

This one is too dreary for me enjoy. Unlike everyone else on here, this one is acoustic, with special effects being spiced in it. However, they phasers sound, with some of the effects almost sounding like tear drops. However, I don't feel anything out of the effects, and to me, they just don't fit into the piece.  So while it's not horrible, my feelings towards this piece unfortunately drift toward a 4/10. I do kinda wish I could rate it higher, since I get they are trying to create a gloomy atmosphere.

Wild Horse - The Tulips 

Saving the best for last, I see. Now this cover is different from anything else on here. It still fits in, but it's not over drenched in phased guitars or synthesizers, nor is in engrossed in special effects. Instead, there seems to be much more of a sad, but ethereal, indie/alternative rock vibe. The lead singer emotes the lyrics in a beautiful, mournful way, and as for the texture, there is a very moody, but upbeat, sound to it. Jonathan Moss describes it as sounding "Kind of like shoegaze but without the off the walls sound", and I couldn't agree more. I try not to hand out 10/10 too often, but I think this one deserves it. Not only does it do justice to the original, it manages to basically create a whole new masterwork of out of it.  What a great way to finish off this album.

Overall, while this certainly is not an amazing album, it's still pretty enjoyable. I do like how, rather than going for the easy route and just covering all the songs from their psychedelic era, most of the artists on here decided to branch and arrange songs from their 1963-1965 and 1968-1978 period. Overall, I would say that they were moderately successful, in that most of the artists stilll manged to preserve the greatness of the Stones even when they give their songs such different arrangments. Fans of The Rolling Stones may not enjoy this, but for fans who love indie and/or psychedelic rock, this is highly recommend, whether or not you are a Stones fan.

Acoustic Guitar Tribute to Yes- Acoustic Sessions

1) I've Seen All the Good Time 2) Heart of the Sunrise 3) Love Will Find A Way 4) Sound Chaser 5) Six Wives of Henry 8 6) All Good People 7) The Clap 8) White Car 9) Shoot High Aim Low 10) And You and I 11) I'm Alive 12) Machine Messiah 13) I'm Running 14) Your Move 15) Long Distance Runaround 16) Owner of a Lonely Heart 17) Holy Lamb 18) Starship Trooper 19) Our Song 20) Almost Like Love 21) Silent Spring 22) Roundabout 

Okay so this review was supposed to be in tribute to the recent death of Chris Squire but I’m not sure what type of tribute this will be, considering this might be the worst fucking album (figuratively, though even more so literally) I’ve ever heard.

To clarify, I would love to hear an acoustic tribute album to Yes. To clarify my clarification this is no such tribute album. The whole thing is synthesized! And there’s drum machines! Alright when I was 12 I got this cheap midi keyboard from a charity shop which could crudely synthesize other instruments. The sound in this album still sounds quite superior but it has the same fake mechanical feel. If I was lucky this is solely what I’d get- which shows my low opinion on luck- but in addition to that on certain songs these horrendous sound effects show up, like a jammed printer, or a group of avant-garde musicians jamming together with printers.

Oh and it’s two hours. Two hours of crappily synthesized pseudo-muzak.

However I do not want this review to be another hatespew like The Beatles Barkers so I will make some cursory observations. Okay so one of the things that I found appealing about Yes is missing here. That was the way the instruments would interact with each other, forming almost a dialogue. Now I honestly think with some effort this could have been re-created but rather than various acoustic guitars with different tones and timbres reacting to each other there’s two lifeless fake acoustic guitars playing different melodies with a drum machine underneath that sounds like it was programmed as music for robots to sleep to. Sometimes the ‘acoustic guitars’ sound like harpsichords. Maybe they changed the concept of the album halfway through.

Secondly the album doesn’t really have a mood. I could use the word laconic but I consider myself laconic and have no wish to compare myself with this album. It’s just so dull and lifeless. It’s soulless, it feels almost nihilistic, like no human being made this. To continue the robot theme- for my book of robot themed rock reviews- it sounds like a computer was fed a bunch of Yes albums and made to re-create them. Oh and it’s a broken computer and the CDs are scratched.

Okay I’ve lapsed into hatespew again. Allow me one histrionic declaration and I will continue the rest of the review properly. Alright:

THIS ALBUM IS THE SOUND OF THE UNIVERSE’S HEART BEING BROKEN.

Okay, now to concentrate on some individual songs. For the most part that’s pretty impossible. They all sound the same. Personally I find Yes to have been excellent melodicists so the album does contain the beautiful Yes melodies but in such an amoral form. This is the album that a misanthropic ex-hippie army would march to. It’s uniform. However some songs can be commented on. There’s three versions of I’ve Seen All Good People, the first one called I’ve Seen All The Good Time the second All Good People and the third Your Move. Did I say three versions? Sorry they’re actually the same song. Half of Big Generator is featured on this! Half!

One positive thing. There’s actually a semi-semi-semi almost kind of somewhat decentish cover of Machine Messiah. For the first half it almost manages to preserve the creepy mood of the original whilst retaining the eerie mechanic laidback vibe of the rest of the album, creating something of a contrast. It’s still awful though.

I can’t remember which but one of the songs me and Franco compared to video game music. The type of game it would accompany would be one where you’d have to feed a dragon every five seconds and that’s literally all the game was. No progression. You’re feeding it screaming fruit and the graphics are awful 3D with a black background. If you fail to feed it you go back to the beginning, no saves.

Um….more insights? Sure. Who the hell was this album made for? The lack of effort suggests the amount of passion a teetotaller would have for Oktoberfest but at the same time there’s no commercial appeal either. So really what’s the point?

Alright that’s it, I’m going to end this by quoting some of the more entertaining things I said to Franco on Facebook:

Here's my impression of this album: "hey, fuck you!" 

The whole album is like a placid, calm river of blood. 

This album is consistently....."um".......
This album is like being forced at gunpoint to read a book which is just the word teeth for one thousand pages and sometimes it's spelt wrong (paraphrased because at this point I'd lost interest in grammar).  

And now from a discussion of how this album could have been good with acoustic guitars and effort here’s the wisdom of Mr. Micale:

“BUT NO THEY DECIDED TO BE FUCKWARDS AND DO THIS PIECE OF SHIT FOR NO REASON GAAAHHH FUCK THEM FUCK THEM FUCK THEM” 

Symphonic Music of Yes

1) Roundabout 2) Close To The Edge 3) Wonderous Stories 4) I've Seen All Good People 5) Mood For a Day 6) Owner Of A Lonely Heart 7) Survival 8) Heart Of The Sunrise 9) Soon 10) Starship Tropper

(This and Jonathan Moss's review is dedicated to Chris Squire, bassist of Yes. His style was innovative and inventive, and he was a lot more influential than many give him credit for. May he rest in peace.)

This was a difficult album to review, because it took me a while to form my final opinion on it. First off, unlike most tribute albums, some of the members of Yes were actually involved in this album, with Steve Howe contributing to the guitar, Bill Bruford playing the drums, and Jon Anderson singing lead vocals on a few of the tracks. Second off, this album strikes me as a great idea that misses the mark of being well executed.

See, I don’t hate it, as I found the orchestra to sound gorgeous, and I can tell that sizable amount of effort was put into it. However, I can’t really like this much either, because it’s not like David Palmer really does anything different to the songs. For almost all the tracks, all that Palmer seems to do is replace certain parts of the song with orchestration, with the original rock instrumentation still remains intact. This bothers me, because if the idea was to make Yes sound like symphonic music, then this album to me was a failure, because the mixture of the rock instrumentation and the orchestra just doesn’t seem to blend in at all. It’s like there are two different styles going on at the same time, and they don’t seem to be interacting or supporting each other at all.


For example, let me focus on Close To The Edge. They don't anything to ruin this masterpiece, but it's difficult for me to think of a reason why I would listen to this version as opposed to the original. The orchestra doesn't add or take away anything from the piece, it's just there. The moment when the song gets into the mellowed down, soft atmospheric section in the middle, the orchestration suddenly slips right in perfectly, and it becomes absolutely beautiful, but aside from that, nothing really stands out.

That's more or less the entire album. Some interesting moments here and there, but overall nothing really grabs my attention. I like how Owner Of A Lonely Heart incorporates those quirky samples from the original into orchestration, and the first section of Survival does a good job at making the melody fit well into the symphony,  but the female harmonies in the chorus don't fit in and sound right. I could go on and on about how each song is done, but the style is so similar from one another that I can't really think of anything else to say. I mean, I could talk about Jon Andedsons appearances, but is there to say? Yeah, he does take the lead vocals on Roundabout, but other than the orchestration, it's not like the song is any different from the original, so it's really no big deal. I also find myself questioning the decision to use the second section of "I've Seen All Good People" instead of the first. I feels weird to hear a symphonic arrangement of the rocking section of the song, and the first section seem like it would have been much better suited for a symphonic arrangement, but whatever, their decision I guess. I also don't like how they added rock drums to Wondrous Stories, since first off, this piece never had any to begin with, and second off, without them, this could have easily been a highlight, since I always felt that Wondrous Stories always sounded dreamily symphonic to begin with.

There is an exception though to all of this though. Of these ten tracks, I would say the one that sticks out the most for me is Mood For A Day. I just LOVE how the orchestra plays along and interacts with the guitar, making it sound completely natural and comfortably fit in. It adds quite a bit to the piece, and I would recommend that every Yes fan hear this.

But, really, aside from that, the only other piece that sticks out is Soon…ugh, what do that I say about that one? You'd think that this piece would be MADE for a beautiful orchestral arrangement, since it already had a lush and symphonic atmosphere to begin with, but this version has so little cohesion that I feel no one really knew what they doing with this. I’m not able to tell whether they wanted it to be a straightforward rendition, or if they wanted to make it sound like a soundtrack written by John Williams. The strings at moments just sound REALLY over the top and sentimental, and ahhh, I just don’t like the acoustic guitar that takes over the lead melody. It sounds too plucky and feels out of place of everything else. Gosh darn it guys, this could have easily been a great rendition, how could you have messed it up so badly? Ah, damn it.

So, in conclusion, I have finally decided my opinion on this, and I believe that this is simply not a very good album. I actually really want to recommend this to at least someone, since there seemed to have been hard work put into it, and the band themselves are pretty involved in this...but it's a challenge for me to figure who I would recommend this to. Guitars, bass, and drums are STILL very present, so it's not really a full scale symphonic tribute, and the arrangements stick too much to the original to really make an impact towards anyone. The end result is a mixture of ingredients that don't blend well together, and that's too bad because I could have seen this working quite well if maybe the album was done slightly differently. Like, for example, maybe they should have just done a straight up symphonic album, with no rock instrumentation. I personally think that would have sounded COOL. But, anyways, if you really want an album that blends orchestration with the music of Yes, and does it well, go get Symphonic Live. On the other hand, I still highly recommend you check out the wonderful version of "Mood For A Day", and Jonathan DID like this album more than me...so I guess it wouldn't hurt for you to check this out if you are a Yes fan. Who knows, maybe you'll like this album.

When all is said and done, it could be MUCH worse. Go read Jonathan's review.

We're A Happy Family: A Tribute to The Ramones

1) Havana Affair- Red Hot Chilli Peppers 2) Blitzkrieg Bop- Rob Zombie 3) I Believe in Miracles- Eddie Vedder & Zeke 4) 53rd and 3rd- Metallica 5) Beat on the Brat- U2 6) Do You Remember Rock and Roll Radio?- Kiss 7) The KKK Took my Baby Away- Marilyn Manson 8) I Just Wanna Have Something to Do- Garbage 9) Outsider- Green Day 10) Something to Believe in 11) Sheena is a Punk Rocker- Rancid 12) I Just Wanna be Your Boyfriend- Peter Yorn 13) I Wanna be Sedated- The Offspring 14) Here Today, Gone Tomorrow- Rooney 15) Return of Jackie & Judy- Tom Waits [BONUS TRACKS] 16) Daytime Dilemma (Dangers of Love)- Eddie Vedder & Zeke 17) Today Your Love, Tomorrow the World- John Frusciante 

So debatably The Ramones started the punk rock genre of music. Now that I’ve started with that ‘important’ yet hackneyed opening sentence stating The Ramones importance I can talk about how much I like them. True I don’t listen to them much anymore but The Ramones really were a great band. Unique, catchy, DIY and most importantly fun as hell. And obviously completely deserving of a tribute album. But deserving of this one?

Well on the whole I’d say yes. To start with it’s filled with big named artists. Of course that’s no sign of artistic merit but hell it’s enough to give the album some relevance. However aside from that it’s fairly decent. Johnny Ramone in all his humbleness supervised it and smartly told the bands involved to do their own thing with it, because who wants to listen to a bunch of Ramones tributes that sounds like The Ramones?

So on the one hand this gives the album quite a bit of diversity. This is immediately evident with the first song which is a cover of Havana Affair by the Red Hot Chilli Peppers. I’m really not a fan of RHCP but this is a pretty solid cover. They go for a reggaeish tempo though it's really more laidback rock music. The guitar playing is laconic and clean but a nice crunchy riff shows up at some points. Anthony Kiedis’ vocals don’t do anything for me and the keyboard tone is pretty cheesy but hey Johnny Ramone liked it enough to put it as the first song.

On the other hand this can be a tad hindrancesome. So to get to the most negative portion of the review this, um, ‘originality’ really backfires with two tracks. I’m talking specifically about Rob Zombie’s cover of Blitzkrieg Bop and Marilyn Manson’s cover of The KKK Took my Baby Away. They appear to do their own thing with it until you remember the unoriginality of making bad music. That was cheap but I stand by it. Also I swear I went into this with an open mind, I didn’t set out to hate these. I was optimistic! Anyway in trying to put my thoughts on the Zombie song in a more concrete manner I realised maybe it would be wiser to give the visceral reaction from my notes:

“Hey it’s the Ramones most iconic song and the guy who directed the Halloween remake! So far it’s pretty unrecognisable. It barely sounds like the original riff. Oh Christ this is awful. Tuneless shouty vocals trying to sound glammy, generic hard rock guitar playing and an overall hilarious ‘tough' guy vibe. Ersatz shit. THIS IS FUCKING AWFUL. I think the guitar solo wandered over from a hair metal tribute album. Sluggish tempo, football hooligan asshole shouting the title, y’know, The Ramones! Really unpleasant and funny. Like watching a clown get run over." 

Fortunately Manson’s cover is awful in a more conventional way. Manson, having a reputation for doing serious music figures this is the best approach for covering The Ramones. Look, I’m all for artists trying to put their own visions on things, Christ I think it’s the best recipe for the potentially great tribute albums out there, but in doing so Manson completely misses the essence of The Ramones. Punk! Pop! He has slightly orchestral backing going on, plodding solemn piano playing and the vocals kind of stangle whispered in an attempt to sound…sexy? Ironically the original song- which was upbeat powerpop- manages to sound a lot more emotional due to the contrast between Joey’s tone and the happy music. It feels more honest. This feels contrived and dull.

Eddie Vedder of Pearl Jam fame and a band called Zeke do two covers, one a bonus track. They're both pretty good! Especially I Believe in Miracles. The backing music is bright and catchy, the vocals are passionate and...um...why does there always have to be a second description with me? Anyway the song is basically a mixture of hard and alternative rock but it's punkish enough. Oh and there's a Kiss cover. It's good but I can't help quoting what I said to Franco when listening to it: 

"Y'know re-listening to this Kiss cover it feels almost cruel. The Ramones- a band that strived for success whilst debatably creating a new genre of music and finding no success- being covered by Kiss, a band that done nothing new, were blatant about their love of money and became filthy fucking rich" 

Ideology aside the cover is nice but pretty obnoxious. 

I've always considered- and I know I'm not alone in this- Metallica the U2 of the metal world, so it's fitting that their covers are right next to each other. Metallica cover 53^rd and 3^rd. They manage to do it pretty well in the music department, which doesn't stray too far from the original- maybe a bit heavier and less street tough- but still punkish. The problem is with the vocals, James Hetfield doesn’t make any attempt to adjust to this, sounding like he should be singing over Metallica’s typically cluttered heavy proggish metal. It's not terrible but he does sound a bit silly. Same problem with U2 really. The band actually does a somewhat convincing punk impression but Bono still sounds like he’s singing Where The Streets Have no Name. They’re both enjoyable and worthwhile covers though.

You couldn't do a Ramones tribute album without some punk band though! Of course this results in songs that sound much closer to the original versions but there's nothing particularly wrong with this. The bands I'm referring to are Green Day, Rancid and The Offspring. I would call them the Pop Punk bands except I’ve never heard Rancid described that way. This might actually make sense as their cover of Sheena is a Punk Rocker really doesn't work for me. They miss the fun of the song, it sounds unpleasant and self-serious. They’re still playing Pop Punk but with none of the levity, so it creates a potentially interesting juxtaposition, though fails. I know Rancid are Clash enthusiasts but you can’t treat The Ramones that way, which is what is seems like they’re attempting. It just seems rushed and paradoxically bombastic. The Offspring- a much more maligned band- for this reason in my opinion do a better cover (of I Wanna be Sedated), because they don’t take it so seriously and play it with the right amount of fun, so you end up feeling they greatly enjoyed playing it. It’s still not exactly a great cover and I’ve already forgotten it (their version) but it’s a nice experience while it’s on. Green Day do Outsider which I still remember! It’s a really good cover. Pretty similar to the original but much more teenagery.

I feel pretty safe in calling Tom Waits cover of Return of Jack & Judy. He takes a good but somewhat gimmicky Ramones song and does it as a Tom Waits song. Tom Waits is awesome! Bumpy percussion, bluesy growly singing, distorted meaty guitar playing and an overall rollicking and unstable atmosphere. Another great cover- and one which I didn’t initially appreciate- is Rooney’s version of Here Today, Gone Tomorrow. The singer is earnestly emotional, there’s punky rhythm guitar playing, lead guitar that sounds like it could have come from a particularly moody new wave album. The song manages to build up these great moments of catharsis but in a sweet pining way which makes it more heartfelt. It’s great bit of melancholic powerpop.

The album ends with a John Frusciante cover of Today your Love, Tomorrow the World. I've not heard any of the guys solo albums but I find this cover quite enjoyable. It's lo-fi acoustic guitar based music which sounds pretty eerie whilst retaining that patented Ramones melody. At the risk of appearing hipsterish I'm going to say I like this cover. 

So, although the album definitely has its low points and generally unmemorable points when I think about it in aggregate I’d definitely recommend it. It works stunningly well as whole and there’s even a few individually great songs to enhance it. Unfortunately it’s not on Spotify but buy (ordownload) it and you’ll have a good hours’ worth of mixed entertainment.

Woofers & Tweeters Ensemble- Beatle Barkers

1) I Want To Hold Your Hand 2) Love Me Do 3) Ob-La-Di Ob-La-Da 4) We Can Work It Out 5) I Saw Her Standing There 6) I Feel Fine 7) Can't Buy Me Love 8) All My Loving 9) Day Tripper 10) She Loves You 11) A Hard Day's Night 12) Paperback Writer 

Franco 

“When I bought Pet Sounds, I expected GOD DAMN PET SOUNDS NOT THIS BAROQUE POP SHIT”

If you think about it, there’s a good chance that someone who bought that highly acclaimed Beach Boy’s album had actually hoped for it be a collection of pet Sounds, and in turn, was disappointed by the results of the actual album.

Well, no fear, because this Beatles tribute album with actual pet sounds on it should provide closure to their needs

Like, I’m serious. The main melody of each song is replaced with dogs barking, sheep baaing, chickens clucking, cats meowing, so on and so forth. Sounds like a crazy idea, but does it work?

…

BUT DOES IT WORK?

This is probably the stupidest album I’ve ever heard in my life. The first two minutes of the album, I was crying of laughter. By the end, I was crying in despair. Why…why would anyone make this? What was the end goal? Like seriously, someone actually put thought and effort into this, and actually wanted it to be released to the world. Why? As a joke? Just for the fun of it? I don’t know. I really don’t know. And it’s gotten into my head. The only reason I listened to this all the way was to check my endurance, but alas I don’t feel too good after listening to it.

I mean, even with animal noises being the style of this album, it still sucks. There is no timing in this album, and it sounds like they are just randomly pressing buttons on a keyboard.

Oh god. Why am I still reviewing this? My head hurts. I feel sick. All that I feel is guilt. Why did I listen to this? Why did I think this would be a good idea to review?

Man…

The problem with this album is that…oh geez, how am I supposed to review this? I mean, all that this album comprises of is the backing tracks to Beatle songs, with there being animal sounds piled on top, somewhat arranged to the form the melody. That’s it. That’s all there is. For 2 minutes, it’s hilarious and amusing, for 29 minutes, it’s the equivalent of having a hammer hit on your head repeatedly, over and over and over again. If that’s the type of music you like, then this should be 10/10. If not, then that’s one way to know that you aren’t insane.

Anyways, I don’t know what else to say. I’m done.

Jonathan

I’m writing this review before finishing the album. That should tell you what type of album it is. It’s the Beatles with dog sounds for 29 minutes. Not just dogs! Sheep, chickens, cats! Maybe they’re trying to make some statement on how animals started the music and we pesky humans stole it. Maybe they’re just nuts. Franco just pointed out someone put thought and effort into this.

Man…………….

Anyway The Beatles with dogs and other animals doing the vocals! Sounds hilarious. No it doesn’t you fuckhead this is the sound of insanity. This is one of the most painful things I’ve ever heard. The backing tracks sound dull and synthesized in places. The ‘vocals’ are definitely synthesized. They try to make them follow the vocal melodies but it sounds like a cacophony of cacophonies of animals. If ever a good case for abattoirs was made it was here. I want to eat a dog.

Every copy of this album should be hunted down and destroyed.

I used to love The Beatles. Now I love nothing.

For every album there should be a cover album like this, to remind us why we like music. 

I mean I thought it would be good for a laugh, worth listening once. This isn’t a review it’s a warning. STAY THE FUCK AWAY FROM THIS ALBUM. 

Listen to this album!: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9yo-XqDzGuY